One thousand times (Poem)

By Shahrzad Irani

September 3, 1999
The Iranian


One thousand times a day, you tell me that you love me
And yet I do not believe you
Messengers come with great books declaring your love
And yet I cry in my sleep every night

With each season, you send a different flower perfuming my house
And yet I do not trust the message

Many describe your great love
And yet I feel these stories are about someone else
Each spring you send a new message in hope of renewing love in my heart
And yet my heart is a desert where hope, love, and trust cannot grow

One thousand times a day I tell you that I love you
Oh how badly I love you!
With every breath, you remind me of your love
And with the next breath I forget your promises
Everywhere you have left a sign of your love
I am ashamed of seeing so much love and not believing you
How badly I love you!

I am often lost and you forgive my transgressions
You offer a twig of love to brush the dust off my suffering, traveling eyes
You offer shelter for my distrustful, forgetful, and shameful soul

How easily you love
How magnificently you love